First Looks
Traditionally, the couple sees each other for the first time on their wedding day during the ceremony. A superstition says that it is bad luck for a couple to see each other before their ceremony on their wedding day. However, you don't have to follow that tradition! Here are some things to think about when deciding whether or not to do a first look.
What is a First Look?
A "first look" is when the couple chooses to see other before the ceremony at a planned time during the wedding day. Usually, this is a private time for the couple to share a special moment together before the ceremony.
How does it work?
Both partners are completely dressed and ready at this point, and they plan to meet each other at a certain place to reveal their attire and spend a few minutes together with just the two of them. Typically, the one partner will stand with their eye closed or their back to the other, and then the other partner will come up behind, tap them on the shoulder or do something else to get them to turn around. You don't have to do it like that though! You could also meet around a corner at the same time, hug each other at the same time, or anything else you'd like to do.
How long does it take?
From start to finish, a first look usually takes about 30 minutes, give or take. It takes about 10 minutes to set up the first look, which means getting both partners in position and ready to go. I usually help get both partners in position, and facilitate when to do what (walk forward, tap on shoulder, etc.). After the initial moments of just being with each other (about 5 minutes), we usually take portraits for another 10-15 minutes.
After those portraits, I recommend building in time for full wedding party photos or even some family photos if possible.
Check out the page about timelines to see how a first look fits into a wedding day.
1. More time for photos before the ceremony
At most wedding days, my goal is to get as many photos done before the ceremony as possible. After a first look, we will do portraits of just the couple for about 10 minutes. By doing a first look, we can potentially get couple portraits, full wedding party photos, and some family photos done before the ceremony. Then, we will need less time between the ceremony and reception for photos. If you want to go to your cocktail hour, I recommend doing a first look.
2. More opportunity for photos
A first look is a photo-worthy moment in itself. It's an intimate, exciting, romantic moment when raw emotion usually comes out from both partners. Plus, you have more opportunity to have photos of both partners together. We do portraits immediately after the first look, but we can also do more couple portraits and after the ceremony or at sunset.
3. Calm nerves
Your wedding day is one of the biggest days of your life. It's ok to be nervous! Seeing your partner before the ceremony can calm some of those nerves and give you peace of mind that your partner is there, ready, and excited for the wedding. Doing a first look is an especially great option if you get nervous around crowds or don't like being the center of attention. A first look is a way to capture genuine emotion without the nervousness that crowds can inflict.
4. Spend quality time together
Everyone says that your wedding day will go by fast. A first look allows you to spend some one-on-one quality time with your partner during the wedding day. You can both slow down, be present, and enjoy each other's company. You usually don't get much time for just the two of you on your wedding day.
5. It doesn't take away from the ceremony moment
Doing a first look doesn't necessarily take away from the moment when you see each other for the first time at the ceremony. Seeing each other privately before the ceremony is totally different than seeing each other at the ceremony with all of your friends and family watching. Both moments are special, and if the feelings are there, the emotion is going to come out regardless of what you do. I've had couples do a first look and still have an incredible moment at the ceremony.
Here's an example of a couple who did a first look but also had a wonderful moment at the ceremony.
6. Hair and makeup are fresh
Since the first look happens earlier in the day, both partners will look their absolute best, both for each other and for photos. Hair and makeup will be fresh, and neither of you will have had the chance to sweat, cry, or get dirt on your clothing. Of course, you'll look stunning all day long, BUT I'm just planning ahead here in case something were to happen later in the day.
7. It's less risky
As much as you plan and prepare for your wedding day, you ultimately can't know everything that could happen. Whatever happens, happens. What if the ceremony starts late? Or if your dress rips later? Or if it starts raining after the ceremony? When you do a first look, you can get a lot of photos done before the ceremony, so there is less to worry about later.
1. You lose the opportunity to have the first look during the ceremony
If it is important to you that you don't see each other at all before the ceremony, then don't do a first look. Your moment at the ceremony will be magical, and we will still get all the photos done.
2. First looks take more time in the beginning of the day
You'll need to shift your timeline so that there is enough time in the beginning of the day before the ceremony to accommodate for a first look. If you don't do a first look, everything can start a little later.
3. Superstition
If you believe that seeing each other before the ceremony is bad luck, then save that moment for the ceremony. Doing a first look is also less traditional.
I recommend doing a first look if:
- You have a large family and you want lots of family photos
- You want lots of couple portraits
- You want to be able to spend some one-on-one time with just your partner before the ceremony
- You want to go to your cocktail hour
As a photographer, I love first looks, and will usually recommend them for the reasons I listed above. Here are some instances where I believe you should or shouldn't do a first look.
I do NOT recommend doing a first look if:
- It is important to you that you do not see each other before the ceremony
- You believe it is bad luck to see each other before the ceremony
- You want to stick with traditional wedding practices
Final Notes
Whether or not you choose to do a first look is entirely up to you. I believe that couples should create a wedding day that represents who they are and brings them joy.
Either way is fine with me, and we will get all the beautiful photos we need regardless of whether or not you do a first look.
If you have any questions, just let me know!
Copyright Abby Shepard Photography
